Together We Heal

Together We Heal is for any who suffer from the trauma of childhood sexual abuse. We provide a safe forum for survivors of abuse to share, learn and heal. We work to expose sexual predators and their methods of getting into our lives.


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Qualified Therapists/Counselors/Coaches Needed! **Updated 11/5/2014**

Our needs are increasing for more therapists/counselors. Please read and contact us ASAP!!

My name is David Pittman and I am the Executive Director for “Together We Heal”. We are a 501(c)(3) non-profit organization that provides cost-free counseling/therapy for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Additionally we give presentations, workshops and seminars on how parents can better protect their children from sexual predators.

We already work with dozens of licensed therapists, counselors and life-coaches, who donate their time and talent in order to help survivors begin the healing process and work through the multiple mental health challenges they face. But that number still isn’t enough.

With ever-increasing healthcare costs combined with the limitations placed on mental healthcare providers, as well as the rising number of survivors coming forward, we find ourselves in greater need of more therapists/counselors willing to work with us to help survivors of abuse.

It is with these factors in mind that I come to you now asking for your generosity. We need more volunteers who are qualified in working with victims who suffer from the trauma of childhood sexual abuse. Below is a brief list of the variety of challenges these survivors face and we need for you to have experience in these areas.

Abandonment Issues
Addiction & Recovery
Anger Issues
Attachment and Abuse Issues
Depression and Anxiety
Panic Disorder and Phobias
Personality Disorders
Post-Traumatic Stress Disorders (PTSD)

I know this is an unorthodox approach of reaching out to professionals, but we are in desperate times, and these survivors need us to take drastic measures. We are following the St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital model, that no one be turned away because they can’t afford it.

We do not ask for or require any minimum time from any of our volunteers. Whatever time you are able to give, we are grateful for and appreciate. Even if you can help just one or two survivors, that would be a tremendous gift! And the need is not just in the U.S., we need therapists/counselors from all over the world as people reaching out to us come from all continents.

I know what I am asking is not easy, but I also know there are enough good-hearted people in this world who are willing to help these survivors. I know because I am a survivor of CSA and its because I had the good fortune of having such a therapist come into my life and help me that I am where I am today. It is to you I am speaking directly.

Please contact me at (754) 234-7975 or email me at dpittman@together-we-heal.org – Contact me anytime and I will respond ASAP.

When emailing, please send your CV, resume, list of certifications/degrees, or the life experience you’ve had that qualifies you to help others, so we can go through the proper vetting process.

One last point. We aren’t looking for cookie-cutter therapists and counselors. The needs of survivors vary tremendously and because of that, we have people from many types of backgrounds that work together with us. Being a survivor of abuse or having life experience can be just as important as a degree on the wall. What we need are folks that genuinely care for and want to help others. Please keep this in mind and allow your heart to guide you when considering becoming a part of this amazing team.

Respectfully,

David Pittman
Executive Director, Together We Heal


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Please Stop This!

I’m re-blogging a post I just read that has an important message and perspective on human trafficking…please take a moment to read…

http://freedom3-14-13.blogspot.com/2013/06/please-stop-this.html


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Its All About Perspective, So Whats Yours?

As recovering addicts and/or survivors of childhood sexual abuse, we often compare what we went through to that of others. It’s human nature. We think to ourselves, well what they went through was so much worse than myself, what gives me the right to complain. Or conversely, we look at another and say, oh come on, that’s all? We constantly do this.

I remember sitting in my first few NA rooms, listening to story after story and thinking, I’m not like these folks at all. I’m no crackhead, walking the streets, selling my body for a $10 high. Or I would rationalize, I’ve NEVER shot junk in MY veins or shared a needle with a disease-riddled body. Then one day I heard a story not so different from mine. It’s what therapists and sponsors call “your moment of clarity”. It’s when you finally come to terms with your own addiction and figure out, an addict is an addict is an addict. It doesn’t matter what the drug is, or the background your come from or even what you’ve done to get high. It’s when you acknowledge that you have no control over the drugs that control you.

And being a survivor of CSA is no different. It doesn’t matter who abused you, how often it happened, what they did to you or they made you do to them. A survivor is a survivor is a survivor. One case is not “worse” or “lesser” than another. To illustrate let me share a story a trusted friend told me many years back. He asked me to answer what appeared to be a simple question.

Three scenarios:

First, a teen about to go on their very first prom date when, BAM! A huge zit appears at the very end of their nose. With no way to conceal and no time to heal, panic and anxiety set in.

Second, a young man has just been told by the Dean, his academics did not pass this semester and will be on probationary suspension for 1 term. How does he begin to explain this one to mom and dad? And did I mention, he’s on scholarship because they have no money to send him to college.

Third, a couple just received a $30,000.00 bill from the IRS. Evidently their CPA was didn’t file properly and no matter what, they are now liable for all monies, plus penalties. No if’s, and’s or but’s about it, they MUST pay and they don’t have enough savings to cover it. And oh yeah, their daughter just came home pregnant from college. Another two mouths to feed and bodies to keep warm and safe inside their home.

So the query is…which one is “worse”?

Being the bright young man I was at the time, I told him, oh this is easy! I’ve already had a “zit moment” that totally embarrassed me in high school. He or she will eventually forget all about that nonsense! As for the young man in school, I could relate. Got into some trouble in college and had to “sit out” a semester myself. No biggie! I went to Florida for that term, worked for my dad and when I’d “done my time and penance”, I reenrolled, finished up and graduated from the University! So the answer was clear, the couple with the 30k debt to the IRS. What a horrible position to be in. With no foreseeable way to pay, with a child and a grandchild returning “home” in need of mom and dads support, both emotionally and financially. This was a no-brainer.

Turns out, I was the only one with no brain! You see, we each “see” the prism of crisis through our own life experience. If we have already been through an event, we understand what lies on the other side. What potential outcomes there may be. Even what variety of options are available to us. But to each and every one of those folks, the situation before them was the “worst” they had ever faced at that point in their lives. With NO idea of how they were going to get through it. It’s truly relative when it comes to situational crisis. There is no such thing as a “bigger or lesser” problem. To whomever is going through what they are going through, at that moment, it’s the biggest challenge they’ve had to face.

So keep this in mind when working with others or when addressing your own struggles. Remember to be compassionate to those around you. And don’t forget to give yourself a break too. We all need some sympathy and empathy in our times of trials and tribulation.

One hundred years from now it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove…but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child. –Anonymous

Copyright © 2013 Together We Heal


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Do You Want A Future?

Truth is truth, right? And if it is so, then whether we agree with it or not, it’s still the truth. You may not agree with the concept of gravity, especially if you’re like me when you step on a scale. But if you step off a second floor balcony with no net to catch your fall, you will discover a hard, cement-tasting truth.

Copernicus, Galileo, Bruno and multiple other thinkers were at one time called heretics. In the end, what they found to be the truth went against ALL popular “scientific” notions of the day, religious beliefs or merely values held at the time.

I say this to bring to light the following truth I’ve discovered in my own life –

“You must enter your past to fix your present. If you don’t, you will have no future.”

I know, I know, sounds like a psychobabble cliche, but just as we call something a “generalization”, there’s a reason, that’s because they are “generally” true. So this time, with a non-judgmental or preconceived notion, let me repeat and have you read it once more…

…”you must enter your past to fix your present. If you don’t, you will have no future.”

I admit it sounds a bit ominous. And while it may be hard to hear, I’m merely trying to make a point, emphasizing the truth I discovered in my own life. It wasn’t until I went back to my past; the acknowledgment of the childhood sexual abuse that I endured from ages 12-15, that enabled me to begin to work through the issues of the present of that time. Once acknowledged and beginning to heal, I finally, for the first time in almost 10 years, began to see the potential of a future that lay ahead.

Once upon a time, I was heavily addicted to multiple narcotics to numb myself from the trauma of childhood sexual abuse. This led to three arrests, jail time, fines, no drivers license for a year, loss of tens of thousands of dollars in wages from a career I was genuinely passionate about. And in varying degrees, it cost me a relationship of five years, another of four and even an earlier one of six years. This “past” was destroying my “present” and if something didn’t give, my “future” was going to be even more limited than it already was!

But my story is not an isolated one. It’s not even unique and definitely not as harsh, from my perspective, as some others have been through. But that’s just from my life view. We all have a different one.

So how do we do accomplish this task? How do we get from point A to point B? That is to say, how do we look into our past, into that abyss, without falling back in? Then how do we take that information, apply it to our present so that we have the opportunity to move on into a more positive future? A lot of questions with multiple choice answers, I know.

Even if you’re not an addict or alcoholic, I’m sure you’ve heard the saying, “admitting you have a problem is the first step.” And with survivors of CSA, this saying has some weight as well, just with a different angle. It’s not that we have to admit we have a problem, we have to admit that a horrible event and crime was perpetrated against us. And this is not an easy or small task. In fact, in my case, I made numerous trips to the place where I knew I had to address my abuser. I drove past it, I stopped at the driveway, heck one time I even got out of the car, was walking up the door of the church, when I turned around and drove back home. In total, it took me 6 trips to finally be able to speak out against my abuser. To tell the people in authority above him exactly what he was, what he was capable of, and the danger he posed to the very children he was charged with protecting.

And that last thing i just mentioned was the real motivation behind what i had to do. More than just my own self-serving, self-healing desires behind the action I knew I had to take, more important than shedding the light on the past…even more at stake was the future of the lives of his potential victims.

I know now I wasn’t his first victim, nor was I his last. And how I wished, prayed and pleaded that someone had come forward before he got to me. So now it was up to me. Now I had the strength to face the cold, hard truth. I knew if the young boys he had access to were to have any chance of a future free from the emotional, physical and spiritual torture I experienced, I was going to have to step up and tell the truth of what this monster is.

If I was to have any potential peace with my own future I had to make sure, to the best of my ability, that no other little boy in his life would be molested, abused or raped. And so I did just that. I acknowledged my past, I took action in the present, and I know now I have done all I could within my power to help those boys have a decent future. And in doing so, my future too is one of peace and healing.

So do whatever you need to enter your past in a healthy way. Whether through one-on-one counseling, group therapy or any other professional help you require. Seek it out so you can begin to “fix” your present. And by that I simply mean whatever will help you begin to heal, I know from personal experience nothing gets “fixed” to what it was before. But in doing this, by beginning to heal, you will have a chance to take back what was stolen from you and to have a future and peace you deserve.


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What’s Your Reason To Fly?

I witnessed something this morning that at first made me immensely sad. Initially I thought someone had thrown something at my sliding glass door. When I rose to see who had done it, instead I discovered a tiny blue bird lying on the ground at my feet. Its’ fragile body was twisted sideways and I could see its’ heart pounding from beneath its tattered feathers. As I got closer, it lowered its’ head, its’ heart began to beat slower and I almost started to tear up as I thought I was witnessing the end of this little creature’s life.

My dog was inside going nuts wanting to get to the bird, so I led her away, and truthfully, I really didn’t want to see it die. Strange thing, death. I did my internship at the DeKalb County Medical Examiner’s office in the summer of 1996. I witnessed all manner of death that year. Every conceivable way a person could naturally or horrifically come to their end. The extreme ways in which one or more persons would look into the face of the evil inside to take another’s life. And yet, with the exception of the children’s deaths I saw, I accepted it as the natural occurrence of events, handled myself in a professional manner, and gained knowledge, insight and compassion in what turned out to be a transformative time of my life.

But for some odd reason, I don’t do well with the death of an animal. Especially if it’s been a pet of mine. Knowing this about me, understand why I just couldn’t watch this bird die. So I went back to the couch knowing it wouldn’t be long. I settled my dog down, gave it a few minutes and returned to what I knew was going to be a sad moment.

What I saw before me was remarkable. This brittle-boned fowl had managed to somehow shake the cobwebs out of its little bird-brain, straightened out its feathers, and was teetering back and forth like a heavyweight boxer would had just been given an almost knockout blow! Oh he was wavering back and forth, but he wasn’t down for the count just yet!

I sat down in awe as he fought with every instinct in his body and spirit to regain his composure and his life! As the minutes went on, the rocking back and forth stopped, his heart rate normalized, and eventually he even started to look around as if to say, “What the heck just happened to me?!”

At this point I opened the door, used my cane to scoop him up and onto the shrubs outside my patio so he would be free from ground predators like snakes, rats, etc. You know we have a few of those down here in south Florida.

As I placed him on the shrub, he even started to get his wings flapping. He wasn’t ready to take off yet, but you could tell it was only a matter of time and he was going to be just fine! I was so relieved! I lay back on the couch, watched him for the next 20 minutes and then, BAM, off like a rocket he shot! Flew away as if nothing happened!

This got me reflecting on the “sliding glass doors” that I’ve flown into! After all I have been through; after having been sexually abused as a child, addicted to narcotics in an attempt to numb my emotional pain, arrested, imprisoned, divorced, fired, kicked out, knocked down, and as we say in the south…”felt like I’d been rode hard and put up wet!” How on earth did I manage to do like that little bird? How did I shake off those cobwebs, dust myself off and get back on my feet again? One word – RESILIENT. The human spirit is amazing that way. Like those little birds’ instincts, so ours is to survive at all costs, no matter what’s happened to us.

For that little bird, he was born to fly and that’s what he knew he had to do again. I had to figure out my reason to “fly again”. All of our drive and reasons to push on, to fly again, have as many variables and possibilities as we are individuals. For me, mine is to keep other children from going through what I did and to help my fellow survivors begin to heal. I gain a little more altitude each time a person comes to me and says, “What can I do to better protect my child?” Or when a survivor says, “Thank you for telling your story. When I heard what you said, I knew I could move forward too.” Let me tell you something folks, I’ve done a lot of drugs, I’ve been as high as any addict out there. But for me now, there is no better “high”, no greater lift, then when you know you have helped someone struggling with what you’ve also been through.

So let’s all learn a little lesson from that tiny blue bird. Figure out your reason to fight like hell to survive, and no matter what happens…

…find your reason to fly.


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Another Child Commits Suicide After Sexual Assault and Online Humiliation.

Since I know the people reading this blog are folks that care about children, care about survivors of CSA, and want to do something about it. I feel the need to let you know about ANOTHER child who has committed suicide after being sexually assaulted and humiliated online. Read, and do what y’all do best…take action based on what you know is the right thing to do since law enforcement doesn’t have the balls, courage and moral fortitude to do something about it!

It’s up to US; survivors of CSA, loved ones of survivors and others who actually give a damn about children losing their lives. We can no longer depend on the so-called justice system getting justice for these children. Bless you all for doing the right thing!

http://www.examiner.com/article/rehtaeh-parsons-17-kills-herself-after-being-raped-and-bullied


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How Many Children Must Die Before We Make A Stand?

Another child has committed suicide after being sexually assaulted and humiliated. How many more lives must be lost before we as a society decide to take a stand and say, ENOUGH! Please don’t wait any longer. Join us, join another group that works to end childhood sexual abuse. But for God’s sake, join something and take action! Don’t wait until it happens to your child or a child you know before that occurs. Step up to the plate now. Let’s work together and save the lives of our children!

http://news.yahoo.com/3-teens-arrested-assault-girls-suicide-024221519.html?goback=%2Egde_2354331_member_231913571


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I’ve Got Abandonment Issues

This week we conclude our 3-part series with Rachel Grant as she provides insight on the topic of abandonment. Whether you are a survivor of childhood sexual abuse or not, this is a subject that many folks experience at some point in their lives. If you have or know someone who has, you will benefit from her wisdom. Thank you so much Rachel for blessing us with your words and your spirit.
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Abandon: to leave completely and finally, forsake utterly, desert, to give up, discontinue, withdraw from, withdraw protection or support

When it comes to abandonment, we are very much driven by a fear of the unknown. We do not know if the people we are connecting to may one day withdraw their protection or support. They may “forsake” us, and not just a little, but utterly. The greater the connection, the greater the risk, because we have more at stake should the person choose to walk away.

In an effort to alleviate this terrible sense of “not knowing,” we will often do a variety of things. We will over-control, seek constant reassurance, or be on high alert for anything that looks like withdrawal. Worst-case scenario, as soon as we start to feel close, we will push away and sabotage the relationship.

The fear of abandonment is extremely common in those of us who have been abused. We have experienced very real and tangible abandonment, the loss of protection by those who were supposed to care for us. Unfortunately, we then begin living as if this is going to be the case with everyone we come across.

For quite a long time, I had the false belief that “people always leave.” As a result, guess what, people around me often didn’t stick around for long, because I would pretty much act in a way that ensured they would not want to! It is hard to acknowledge, but we have to be straight about the role we play that leads us to re-create the experience of being abandoned over and over again.

Earlier, I gave you just the first part of the definition of abandonment. Here is the rest:

To give up the control of, to yield (oneself) without restraint or moderation

When I read this, I thought, “Hmm, maybe I need to abandon myself to abandonment!” Our relationships can thrive if we are willing to shift our focus and energy away from trying to prevent the withdrawal of others and enter into an open, free space, where we are present to the fact that they are here with us right now, in this moment. Instead of maneuvering to try to get some guarantee that they will always be here no matter what, we can appreciate the person for being here right now.

The point is, that fear of abandonment keeps us so focused on the future “what ifs” that we miss out on what is happening right now. Another, and more tragic, outcome is that we behave so poorly as a result of our fear, that we pretty much guarantee that things will fall apart.

There is no getting away from taking risks in relationships. We can, however, learn to take calculated risks. This means we have to get out of the nasty habit of connecting to others who are so high risk that we are pretty much setting ourselves up for failure.

One client, intent on maneuvering to get some guarantee that his girlfriend would never leave, would text her every couple of hours to keep tabs on her. If he did not get an immediate response, his meaning making machine would immediately kick into gear, leading him to thoughts such as “She must be with someone else.” As we worked together to challenge his false beliefs, he first had to acknowledge that, while it was possible that she was with someone else, it was unlikely given all of the experiences they had shared. Furthermore, her actions time and again indicated she was committed. The risk he was taking in trusting her therefore seemed well calculated. We then decided that he must hit the pause button (no meaning making) for four hours after sending a text and would limit his texting to three times a day. Over time, his fear and anxiety gradually abated and he was able to form a deeper bond based on trust and respect rather than fear and anxiety.

We need to practice giving up trying to control the future and remain in the present moment. We also need to give some thought to the types of risks we are taking—are they measured (even if still daring) or just playing with fire?

REFLECTION
1. Who abandoned you and how did they abandon you?
2. What have you come to believe about people and relationships as a result?
3. What do you do to protect yourself from being abandoned?
4. How can you shift your focus from trying to control future outcomes to what is happening right now?
5. How do you know if you are taking a calculated risk or not?

Rachel Grant is the owner and founder of Rachel Grant Coaching and is a Trauma Recovery & Relationship Coach. She is also the author of BeyondSurviving: The Final Stage in Recovery from Sexual Abuse. With her support, clients learn to identify and break patterns of thought and behavior that keep them from recovering from past sexual abuse or making changes in their relationships.

Rachel holds an M.A. in Counseling Psychology. With this training in human behavior and cognitive development, she provides a compassionate and challenging approach for her clients while using coaching as opposed to therapeutic models. Rachel is a member of the International Coach Federation & San Francisco Coaches.

Learn more at http://www.rachelgrantcoaching.com


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Pedophiles are like Serial Killers – My Story

Reader content warning:

the following account contains descriptions of grooming and sexual abuse.

My name is David Pittman – For 30 years I kept a secret that almost killed me. From the time I was 12 until I was 15, I was sexually abused by a youth minister at Rehoboth Baptist Church in Tucker, Georgia. I was sexually molested and raped. His name is Frankie Wiley, full name Franklin Andrew Wiley. Due to the pathetic statute of limitation laws in Georgia and too many states throughout the USA, he walks free. Until recently he was serving as an associate minister at Trinity Baptist Church in Ashburn, Ga. While he no longer holds an “paid” position at the church, he still has a leadership role as the “Worship Leader” and has access to little boys because the pastor of the church defends him. I have been told they grew up together so he’s allowing this confessed child molester continued access to potential victims of sexual abuse.

In 2006, I found Frankie serving as youth minister at Jodeco Road Baptist Church, where Jerry Light was the Pastor. I contacted Pastor Light and told him my story. He and the Chairman of Deacons, after doing their due diligence, confronted Frankie. Frankie admitted to both men that he had sexually abused me and swore to them I was the only child this happened to. He was allowed to resign. He then went back to get help from a family at a previous church in Flowery Branch, Ga. When they were made aware of the circumstances, they too told him to leave. He returned to his hometown of Ashburn, Ga and got a job with the school as a substitute teacher. When I told the superintendent, Ray Jordan, he allowed Wiley to “resign”. Jordan belongs to the same church as Wiley. Fellow advocates continue to track his activity with children via social media and personal contacts. If you look at his social media pages, he has dozens and dozens of children as “friends”. Unfortunately, the internet has given him a whole new world of potential victims.

There is an important update I need to give you as the reader. I first posted this article in October of 2012, but as of April, 2022, a total of 12 men have come forward, from 4 different churches, whose ages ranged from 9 to 15, that Frankie raped, molested or sexually assaulted in some way prior to, during or after the time he was sexually abusing me. Their words condemn Frankie as a liar, since he told church officials I was the only victim.

Some of their names are Cale Harbour, Christopher Elrod, Ray Harrell and sadly one is now deceased, Andy Harrell (Ray’s big brother). Andy gave me permission to use his name prior to is death in 2012. Unfortunately several others are not in a place of healing and told me “they just can’t talk about it right now” and I know how they feel. It’s how myself, Ray, Cale and Christopher felt for many years. But they reached out to me because they thought all this time they were the only ones and needed to talk to someone who understood what they had been through.

It’s important that you know how Frankie and other sexual predators like him operate. He invites 2-3 boys over to his house for sleepovers. He keeps 1 or 2 in another room and has the other boy stay with him in his bed. This is where the abuse and/or rape takes place. Or he will tell you that several boys are staying over and when you arrive, you are the only one…trapped.

These vultures go after others like me who come from a family of divorce or worse. They take advantage of our vulnerability; a young boy simply wanting attention from a male role model. This is their “play”, also known as “grooming” and it eventually leads to the abuse. God only knows how many victims there actually are-which is why I am writing this.

The Department of Justice tells us that “a male perpetrator who prefers boys and remains uncaught will have approximately 150 victims over the course of his life.” And one young man I mentioned, can no longer speak at all. He died in June 2012. According to what he told me, because of the shame and guilt from being molested by Frankie Wiley, he took drugs to numb the pain, the drugs lowered his ability to make proper decisions, and in the end it cost him his life. It’s clear to me that his death is on the hands of Frankie Wiley.

And since the state of Georgia has a pathetic statute of limitations on child rape, none of us are able to bring him to justice.

I called Kenneth Keene at the Georgia Baptist Convention (now called the Georgia Baptist Mission Board) to inform him of this pedophile using Southern Baptist churches in Georgia as a haven for hunting. His response was to pray for me and say “sorry but each church acts separately and there is nothing we can do.” After two conversations, I tried to tell him that Frankie had moved churches, but he stopped taking my calls and responding to my emails.

And there really isn’t enough time or space here to share how the SBC, SBC EC, GBMB, Augie Boto, Frank Page, Thomas Hammond and many others in those organizations failed me and countless other victims of sexual abuse.

It appears the Southern Baptist Convention and GBMB, as organizations, are following in the footsteps of the Roman Catholic Church. They prefer to deny and cover-up, rather than own up to the evil within. It appears the Southern Baptist Convention and its churches would rather have more children abused, molested and raped, than to be proactive, remove pedophiles from its churches and help victims.

But don’t just take my word for it, multiple organizations have found countless leaders within the Southern Baptist Church who know of instances of abuse and choose to do nothing. Mr. Keene is listed among them.

Abuse Of Faith

Stop Baptist Predators

Baptist Accountability

“The only thing needed for the triumph of evil is for good people to do nothing.”
                                                                                          Edmund Burke

How many other adults out there have suffered this atrocity and are unable to bring their abusers to justice due to the insufficient laws held by almost every state in the land? Sexual predators know this and count on it. They count on us not saying anything until it is legally too late. The reason being is most survivors of abuse aren’t capable of acknowledging what happened to them until they are about 52 years old. The statute of limitations in almost every state runs out between the ages of 18 to 23. It’s simple math for sexual predators and the organizations that protect them.

When Dr. Light contacted the pastor of Trinity Baptist, Rodney Brown, with verification that Frankie Wiley admitted to molesting/raping me, he said he would bring it to the church. Brown lied. We had to tell the congregation ourselves. While Frankie is no longer a paid staff member, he is still active with the youth. What they fail to understand is these predators NEVER stop until they are caught and incarcerated or deceased. The deacons and leadership at Trinity are either ignorant, negligent or both in failing to protect the children within their care.

When I sent an email to the parents of Trinity Baptist, after the pastor failed to tell them, he called me and said I was a bad person. Pastor Rodney Brown said I was destroying “his” church, that I caused a split in “his” church. To which I replied, “pastor, first of all, it’s not YOUR church. The “Church” is the people who make up the body of Christ, not the person standing in the pulpit. And who is the bad person here? Me, for letting the parents of Trinity know about an admitted child molester with access to their children, OR YOU, who CHOSE to keep it secret until you were FORCED to admit what I told them was the truth?

And hearing that the church split tells me that half of the people there didn’t agree with you in allowing this sexual predator to continue to be around their children.” Below you will find a link to Trinity Baptist Church where they proudly list Frankie as their worship leader. Is this the type of church you want to send your little boys and feel safe about doing it?

http://www.usgennet.org/usa/ga/county/turner/trinity.html

And to any of the people who would deny anything I’ve said, I challenge them to submit to a lie-detector test. I am more than willing to do so and testify under oath. Cale, Christopher and I have the one thing they don’t…the truth.

I wonder how many parents of the children Jerry Sandusky molested wished they had this kind of information. How many little boys would still have their innocence? How many little boys would have been protected? In my view, Rodney Brown is almost WORSE than the pedophile. A pedophile is sick and usually don’t stop until incarcerated or deceased. Rodney Brown, like the administrators at Penn State, or leaders in the Catholic Church, choose to protect the monster in their midst.

My childhood voice was strangled by the rope of molestation. My assailant is free (for now). But with your help, other victims might have the courage to come forward in time to incarcerate these predators. Most survivors have a similar feeling. Feeling trapped and forced to relive the crime in silence. And in too many cases this costs them their lives. Too many have committed suicide because they didn’t have the tools to handle the trauma. Others (including myself) turned to drugs and alcohol to numb their pain (many times ending in an overdose). And even more who are never able to have any kind of life. No loving relationships, no lasting friendships, the loss of any family or support – all due to the pain caused by the crime of abuse, molestation, and rape.

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I was told by a GBI (Georgia Bureau of Investigation) investigator in 2006 something that is seared into my mind…”a pedophile is like a serial killer that leaves their victims alive.”

That is truth articulated. Read it again and really think about it. Think about a little child, trapped, unable to fight off the attacks. And then, unlike a murder victim, that little child has to relive each and every assault for the rest of their lives.

Frankie served as a music and/or youth minister at the following churches from the mid to late 70’s to 2011 – if you or anyone you know has concerns or questions, please contact me.

Pinecrest Baptist Church, Cordele, Ga.
Rehoboth Baptist, Tucker, Ga.
Second Avenue Baptist, Rome, Ga.

Tom’s Creek Baptist Church, Toccoa, Ga,

Poplar Springs Baptist Church

Grace Baptist Church, Gainesville, Ga
A Baptist church in Flowery Branch, Ga.
Jodeco Road Baptist, Stockbridge, Ga.
Trinity Baptist, Ashburn, Ga.

He also worked as a substitute teacher at the local school system in Ashburn, Ga., sometime around 2009-2011.

If you or anyone you know has been sexually abused by Frankie Wiley or by anyone, please reach out to someone. Things are different now. You WILL be believed, you are NOT alone. Please, reach out…there are people you can trust now.

9/25/2013 – Update on the Sexual Predator, Frankie Wiley.

We have a 2013 Update that further validates and reaffirms all we knew. I am posting what ANOTHER victim of Frankie Wiley sent me. You can read it after the ***** marks and my statement about it will follow.

Here is this victim’s story…please read how to this day he feels responsible for what Frankie did to him.

*****

I just wanted to let you know that I too encountered Frankie Wiley in my youth, growing up in Ashburn GA. It was pretty well-known in the ’70s that he was molesting kids. I know of several other boys besides myself during that time. I see you also mention Rodney Brown, and if that is the old Pastor Brown’s son from Sycamore, then he knew about Frankie back then too. I think Rodney was about Frankie’s age, or maybe a few years older, and he and his brother Eddie both knew about Frankie, heck just about everyone in town did. Back then people just called him queer and other names and kind of turned their back, perhaps most not really knowing that he was actually molesting young boys in the church. But all the kids knew. This is when Frankie was in his 20s and he was always involved in leading some kind of youth group. He particularly liked to organize campouts for boys. You get the idea.

At the time when I ended all contact with Frankie, despite his efforts to contact me, I believe he was the Minister of Music at a church in Cordele, GA. That doesn’t seem to be on your list. This would have been somewhere around 1975 or 76. Seems like he was also involved in a church musical group called Maranatha out of Cordele too.

Over the years I’ve looked online to see if he ever got caught or punished, and this website (together-we-heal.org) is the first time I ever found anything mentioning him. Apparently, he still goes UNPUNISHED and UNREFORMED. In my case this was nearly 40 years ago, so that would make him in his mid-60’s now, I think. And he’s probably done the same stuff for 40 years. Even though there were at least 3 incidents I recall, I’ve lived a pretty normal life and been able to cope, I think. I’m sure the scars have caused me some problems, but I’ve never talked about it and never told anyone that I was molested as a child, much less publicly accused Frankie. I’m probably not interested in coming forward now either, after all these years. But after finding this site I had to at least post a note. I’ve put in an email address that will actually reach me, it’s real but anonymized.

If I can provide any information that will help your cause then I’ll consider it, but I’ll probably not make my own identity public. I don’t really want to open up that old wound again, and don’t really want to admit to people who know me that this happened. Yes I was a child, but I feel like I somehow allowed it to happen too, being at a very susceptible age. So I remain ashamed to this day.

*****

Notice how this latest victim coming forward feels responsible for what Frankie did to him? This is why we must protect the children that are currently in harm’s way. Even after being sexually abused, the victim often times feels as though it was something they did to allow it to happen. The ONLY one to blame here is Frankie Wiley! Frankie is the sexual predator. This child did NOTHING to deserve this. Help us support survivors of childhood sexual abuse, educate families about keeping children safer and identifying and prosecuting predators like Wiley.

At one time I thought I was the only person Frankie Wiley sexually molested while I was in the youth group at Rehoboth Baptist Church in Tucker, Ga. But now we know there were more before me, there were others at Rehoboth at the same time as me, and several after at other churches. Today I learned this goes back long before RBC. And this exposes another lie Frankie has told in an attempt to justify his predatory actions. He told me the reason he molested and raped me was because he was raped in seminary. Not that it’s any type of rationale, just the reason he gave. I have also learned this is the type of lie sexual predators make up in order to gain sympathy or early release if incarcerated.

Truth is, he’d been molesting little boys long before that.

Below is a comment posted to the TWH website from a victim of Frankie’s that happened long before Rehoboth and seminary and the cover-up that’s been going on to protect him. This is why we do what we do. To this day, Frankie has access to little boys and we must expose him for what he is.

There are many other “Frankie’s” out there. Please help us name them so we can help those in need receive the healing they desperately deserve!

5/15/2022 – ANOTHER Frankie Wiley/Rodney Brown/Trinity Baptist Church UPDATE

If you recall from this article, there was a time when Wiley was supposedly “fired” from Trinity Baptist Church by Rodney Brown. Well, that wasn’t the truth. Wiley was allowed to resign and quietly leave…for a time.

Wiley tried to join another church in South Georgia. Journey Church in Tifton, Georgia. We were made aware of this, warned the pastor there and they asked him not to come back. But this was just a temporary moment away from church leadership for Wiley.

Sometime during 2021 and 2022, Trinity Baptist Church left the “Cooperation” of the Southern Baptist Convention, and rebranded itself, “Trinity Community Church of Ashburn”. Same Rodney Brown as their pastor, but a different location for the church building. And seemingly most important to them, they are no longer accountable to the SBC for bringing back the admitted child rapist, Frankie Wiley.

Trinity Community Church of Ashburn and Rodney Brown have brought Wiley back into their fold, on to their stage where he is ONCE AGAIN in a position of authority in the minds and eyes of the children and adults of that church. Hard to believe? Don’t believe me? Look them up on Facebook. You’ll find them all right there together!

So all that talk from Rodney Brown about being sorry, for not knowing better, for ridding Wiley from the church to protect the kids under his care. I guess that’s all that was…talk, lies and a PR stunt. Please be sure to refresh your memory of what Brown said not that long ago.

https://christianindex.org/trinity-baptist-pastor-this-situation-has-greatly-changed-my-thinking/stories/trinity-baptist-pastor-this-situation-has-greatly-changed-my-thinking,3080

Evidently Rodney Brown’s real belief, which match his actions, is that he couldn’t dump the SBC quick enough in order to get his buddy Wiley back on stage with him.

And just when you thought Wiley couldn’t sink any lower. He is now trying to sell 2 books. One is an autobiography he writes under his own name but fails to mention any of the boys he’s raped for decades. And the other is a “how to worship better” book under a pseudonym. I guess he wants to be able to sell them without anyone knowing who he really is and what he does. Might put a damper on sales if they know you’ve raped little boys.

Please help us expose Wiley so he can no longer profit from the pain of the lives and souls he’s destroyed! What he is doing is the definition of taking God’s name in vain.

I wish this were all some kind of tragic joke. But it’s not. It just gets worse and worse, and these people don’t seem to care what happens to their children.

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